The view

 Been busy with a writing project lately but I wanted to make sure I don’t neglect my commitment to this blog. The following is a small piece I wrote in 2023

                    The view

      He stands on the balcony of his 3rd floor condo with the wind from the gulf  blowing on his face as he looks down longingly at the tourists mingling and having such a wonderful time.

     He is a level 3 autist. In need of substantial assistance in his daily life. His diagnosis seems contrary to his ability to perform or interact with others. That’s because his intelligence allows him to mask his autism so well people don’t know his struggle is so great.

     He is older and has had many negative experiences in his life because of his autism. He has only recently been diagnosed. The new diagnosis was an awakening of sorts, revealing to him the confusion he has always felt towards the people in the world is a direct symptom of his disorder.

     While he has a yearning to go amongst the tourists he is observing and attempt to participate in their activities he knows the likely outcome will be him feeling akward , anxious and embarrassed of his behavior.

    The people below may be tourist of that location but he knows that he himself can never be more than a tourist of their social world. Only capable of brief interactions with them and never being able to set up residence in  that community.

     Seperate but not equal. He feels there is some invisible force field that prevents him from interacting with people on a large scale. He likens it to racism. To not be allowed inside because of who or what he is. His difference can’t readily be seen. if he points it out , he is shunned even more.